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Jose Blanco

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Сообщения, опубликованные пользователем Jose Blanco


  1. Jose, thanks a lot for the prompt reply! Sorry for my English, but I haven't gripped a couple of moments. "Ahead of time"..I guess the students got the topic to speculate on in advance , that is they had much more than an hour to come up with the whole thing, isn't it? Then, "an index card" is a card with the task, right? The young woman is not a native, isn't she?

     

     

     

    The matter of the essay is very specific. I would not be able to write something like this without previous checking the treacherous spelling of all these medical terms :D, and it is seen that the author is quite knowledgeable about the question which tells me she must have had enough time to write it.

     

    Another question is: What are the criteria of assessment? Apart from organization, what are the other essential requirements to successful fulfilling the task?

     

    One more note is the way an American essay goes. It is far more concrete in comparison with a Russian one. I guess from what you said about it that one of the requirements to a solid

    essay is giving real examples, isn't it?

     

    Radislav, Harry, Valentina, and others. I don't know if my previous post went through, but here is another try. I posted and essay (in-class) from a student who was well-prepared. The following essay is from a native speaker (from one of the Caribbean islands) who is not very prepared to handle college writing. As it is, the essay reflects an improvement from when she started the class.

     

    ************************************************************

     

    I remember the first time I took my girls to daycare at Martin Luther King under the metro rail. The name of the school was Family Christian Association of America (FCAA). I met a teacher who really look mean and didn’t really speak to anyone until one day, when the director transferred my daughter to her class, the first thing came out of my mouth was I don’t want my daughter in that ladies class. Two months went by and I started to get to know her a little bit, so one day she said to me, “can I talk to you about where you work, “I said okay she asked me if I like my job I said yes.

     

    The next thing she asked me do I have a High school Diploma I said yes, she said what about a college degree I said no, she said I don’t mean to get personal about your business, but you seem like a hard working lady, and McDonalds don’t seem like a bright future to look forward to. She said have you ever thought about going to college I said yes but not right now.

     

    We talked about several hours until I ask her what is your name, she said Hilary Rowe I felt like she was a nosy short lady who never minded here own business, which in my heart I know she was right about everything I really just said thank you for the advice. Mrs. Rowe was a short with brown skin and Indian hair, who had a deep Jamaican accent, one of her hand had an extra finger, when I really got to know her, I found out she was a very sweet and generous lady. I can always remember Mrs. Rowe because she taught me how important college is.

     

    I remember one day picking up the girls from school and I was so tired, that I could hardly moved, so Mrs. Rowe replied I am going on my break to get an application and enroll you in collaged so you find a better job, she almost sounded like my parents for a minute, which I got frighten, because she reminded me of my dad, he always made those same remarked to me.

     

    She did go an get the application the next day and had me to fill them out, also took me to get registered for college, and help when I needed it with studying.

     

    I truly believe Mrs. Rowe has a good heart, because everyone she comes in contact with loves her a lot. All the other teachers look up to her for advice as well as spiritual guidance.

     

    I think that’s why people react to her in a certain way is that she really is spiritual person, not only that she is a giving and forgiving person, because when people make her angry she just smiles like nothing is wrong, and later prays about it, and pray for that Individual. My father met her one time and told me she have a sweet spirit that warms his heart.

    Mrs. Rowe really taught me a valuable lesson about the Importance of a college education, because without college its very hard to achieve your goals in life as well as success.

     

    Not every job in the world requires that you have a high school diploma; they also ask do you have some kind of college background, or degree. In my opinion I really can apply a few things in my life, such as going back to college for me changed my life because it really made me see how important college is, also without a degree you cannot get a decent job, or promotion. What she did for me was letting me know the facts of life without a college education.

     

    ***************************************************************************

     

    The student had one week to write the essay on the topic "A person who had an impact on my life." As you can see, there are multiple errors. The range in abilities and preparation of students varies greatly, sometimes even in the same class. The writer is in her mid-40's and works full-time. Se is making a tremendous effort to accomplish her goals.

     

    I hope and pray that readers of this post have managed to stay safe from the heat and fires. We read about it here, but I cannot imagine what some of you are going through.

     

    All the best,

     

    Jose (Ya niem-noga punimayo pa-Ruski) -- I am learning, slowly!


  2. We still need to look at the various techniques of teaching essay writing. The missing link at the moment in Russia is teaching to write a paragraph. Starting small would perhaps take us to a better idea of essay writing. After all the focus of the essay is thesis development and text organization does not come even second moving further away to the end of the list. And ... we often forget about the value of the opening thesis. To me this is the key to a good essay. Really, a good beginning makes a good essay. And a good ending too. And what comes in between.

     

    Everything! What I stress with my students, as much as I can, is syntactic variety and details. The needs and expectations are different, though.


  3. The same can be said about numerous "besides", "in addition to", "also" and other connectives that Russian students were encouraged to use in their "for-and-against" balanced essays. The reason was that without such markers the examiners would sometimes miss argumentations in the essay and the score would go down for this reason. I once had an uneasy debate about it saying that you can't have as many paragraphs in the essay as there are arguments in it and you can't open every argument with a text mechanics device. All in vain. LEA always know better and thus the local rhetoric norms were born. The examiners simply counted the linking devices and that was enough for deciding on the essay scoring.

     

    Radislav, that is unfortunate. You are correct. You really can't "have as many paragraphs in the essay as there are arguments in it and you can't open every argument with a text mechanics device." The essay would sound choppy and mechanical.


  4. Our students also have 60 minutes for the writing paper. And they are also supposed to write about 400 words but they have 2 tasks: 1) a personal letter (100-140 words) 2) an opinion composition (200-250 words). Do you think that it is more difficult?

     

    It really depends on the level of training, the ability of the students to compose sentences in English and to articulate those ideas in a short amount of time. Two tasks in 60 minutes, even though the amount of writing is relatively small, seems more challenging than writing only about one thing.

     

    But it also depends on the purpose of the exam.


  5. If it is possible, Jose, can you post here an example of an essay which deserves a high grade or probably quite original and creative though somewhat grammatically awkward. ...

     

    Certainly.... Let me start with a very competent essay, written in class, in 60 minutes by a student who comes from the type of background I mentioned to you. She was about 26 years old when she took my class, working a full-time job, and raising a daughter by herself. The students were given the topic ahead of time and could refer only to a small index card, where they could have a general pattern of organization.

     

    Topic: A cause or organization that deserves our support.

     

    ##################

     

    Imagine watching a commercial that always made you cry. Well it has happened to me and when I watch it my convictions are so overwhelming. My heart tells me that I can make a difference to help save those innocent little lives of children dying from catastrophic diseases such as cancer. Although there are many causes and organizations

    that deserve our support, the one I feel deserves our support the most is St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital.

     

    To begin with, St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital is one of the premier hospitals when it comes to research in this nation. It opened in 1962, ushering a new era in pediatric research and treatment. Over the past forty six years, with singular purpose, St. Jude has led the advance in finding cures for and treating those with childhood cancers or other catastrophic diseases. Their mission- to find cures for children with catastrophic diseases through research and treatment is a constant driving force. Some of their clinical studies include Brain Tumors, Hematological Disorders, Infectious Diseases, Leukemia’s and Lymphomas, Inherited Immunodefiencies, Solid Tumors, and rare diseases. The scientists have worked along side of the doctors in trying to find these cures. At St. Jude you are never turned down because of your families’ inability to pay. They are there to help everyone that comes fight their life-threatening illness. They don’t just treat them, but they do a lot of research to help them survive.

     

    Next, I would like to add that the survival rate in the present vs. 1962 has nearly tripled. This alone is a blessing. The hospital has even won a Nobel Prize for its advancement in research and finding cures. I believe that Nobel Prize was well deserved because they are so amazing. When you watch the commercial it’s almost hard not to cry. These are precious little children, and because of St. Jude’s, they have a better chance to live. These children haven’t even experienced life yet, or at least not much of it. It’s so sad to see what they’re going through. The amazing thing is that you can also see in these children their will to fight and live. They are so strong to be able to go through all the symptoms of cancer and even treatments. I give them so much credit for that.

     

    My feelings and the reason I believe it’s most deserving of our support is because I have a healthy seven year old beautiful little girl, and so do many others in this country. Most of us have children. What if our children got sick with a life-threatening illness? How would we feel and where would we take them? Well, I guarantee you, it would feel devastating, and we would more than likely take them to St Jude Children’s Research Hospital. So why not invest in this organization now? I have an uncle who had Hodgkin’s disease as a child, and two aunts with Breast Cancer. Although they are fighting cancer, they’ve already lived a good portion of their lives; however these children have not.

     

    In conclusion, for just 62 cents a day/ $19.00 a month we could help these innocent children’s’ chances of survival. That’s less than a can of soda a day. We could even make a one time tax-deductible donation if we’d like. I’ll tell you from doing research on this cause, I have already partnered with them. How could I not?

     

    ############################

     

    The essay is reproduced largely as she wrote it.

     

    I will follow up with an essay that is even better, and one that is not so good.

     

    Thank you again for the interest!


  6. Почему Вы так интересуетесь Россией? - Why are you so interested in Russia?

     

    I could say the history, the literature, the rhythm and sound of the language. But I always just felt admiration and awe for things Russian. But I really do enjoy the sound of spoken Russian. It's like music to me -- like some Spanish speakers listening to Argentinians speak.


  7. А я вот на школьных осенних каникулах, будучи как все москвичи в грипу-ОРВИ, как раз прочитала новую книжку, которую мне привезла(неожиданно) одна ученица из Австралии (ездила туда с папаой).

    Karen Rose. I Can See You. - London : Headline, 2009. - 499 p. ISBN 978 0 7553 4654 7

    Я вполне впечатлилась. Детектив такой про маньяка, который выискивал жертв и назначал им встречи, знакомясь в виртуальном кафе. Но прочитала легко. На любителя в смысле темы, но читать интересно.

     

    Sounds like a good book. I wonder if it's too late in life to learn Russian well enough to read and communicate. I must make this a goal of mine and follow through!


  8. As far as I understood Jose is teaching English to native speakers in the USA. You and I are teachers of English as a foreign Language....

     

    Harry, I teach English Composition at the college and university level. Some of my students are native speakers, but many are not. I love in Miami, Florida. In Miami, we have students from all over the world, but primarily from Latin America and the Caribbean. Many students here, native and non-native speakers alike, come from environments where academic formation is not stressed. Some are the first in their families to engage in any formal education beyond secondary, sometimes even primary, school. What am I implying here? I teach native and non-native speakers, but the educational level of both is not usually what one expects or desires of students attending post-secondary education.

     

    Valentina saw some writings that students posted as part of their class assignements, and I think she was surprised by how poorly some of them wrote. It is a challenge to develop writing skills in 8, 12, or 16 weeks.

     

    As for my being an expert!!!! Well, I consider myself, at 50 years of age, to be a perpetual student. What little I have gleaned from formal education and from teaching, I would like to share. I recognize, however, that what I know for my students may not apply to students learning English in Russia.

     

    I appreciate your questions, but I would not presume to know what is "right" for developing your students' writing skills. I can speak only from my experience and training.

     

    I have graded state and national exams (called the CLAST -- state of Florida -- and AP (Advanced Placement). Students are usually given a fairly general prompt, for example, "A place you would like to visit but may not appeal to others," and they are expected to write a 400 - 500 word essay in 60 minutes. Most essays I read were mediocre, with a brief, 4-5 sentence introduction, a thesis statement at the end of the introduction and 2- 4 development paragraphs with w brief conclusions. Some were horrible, with little organization, no ideas, and abysmal grammar. Some were spectacular, essays that displayed a perceptive mind, creative thinking, and full command of advanced rhetorical skills. The 60-minute time limit, while short, does allow for students to be scored. The 60-minute time limit is useful for administrative purposes, as an evaluative tool.

     

    Please forgive the ramblings, but I do appreciate the opportunity to communicate with colleagues in Russia. I can only dream to visit some day.

     

    Jose


  9. One more thing that would perhaps cast some light on the difference between the Russian and "Western" rhetoric in essays without the least attempt to discriminate against any. Russians tend to philosophize while westerners are trained to draw on factual experience. Just a small example with me as the target for criticism. I was taking one of my courses in the UK and the task was to write an essay "Good fences make good neighbors". That was the time when the Berlin wall collapsed and I was very much impressed by the event. Many of us were still very much under the influence of the mass media discourse at the time and I wrote an essay trying to draw a parallel between a good fence that had been making good neighbors in Europe for fifty years without a war and the Berlin wall. The teacher later said to me that the essay was truly philosophical, but what she had in mind was giving some live examples of how good neighbors whom I might have known lived happily enjoying their privacy because they had a good fence dividing their garden. Since then I have always been telling my students to write down-to-earth ideas without losing touch with the solid ground.

     

    Radislav, what an EXCELLENT example you provide of the way American (and British) teachers of compostion try to impress on students. However, if I had been the instructor, I would have been impressed that you used the very real example of the Berlin Wall and its fall. It seems that you gave her Doestoyevsky, where she (or he) wanted Tolstoy (in an abbreviated manner!).

     

    Jose


  10. One more note. An essay has a word limit of 175 - 275. What do you think about the best word-meaning ratio?

     

    Hmm.... Valentina, the topic itself lends itself to generalities, and with a word limit of 175 - 275 words, the best one can hope for is for a competent essay written at a very general level. If the students can handle the extra writing, I would recommend increasing the word limit to 400 - 500 words. This increased word limit allows a student to supply one or two specific examples.

     

    The essay itself is competent, especially the long paragraph. But really, do the words "In my opinion" advance the writer's argument. A teacher, or any reader, knows that the opinions expressed are those of the writer, unless the writer attributes his or her idea to someone else.

     

    All the best,

     

    Jose


  11. Well, you see, teachers of English in Russia have been working hard to teach Russian students (high school I mean) to write different types of essays. For Russian end-of-school exam our students are to write two types - either a "for and against"( argumentative essay) or an opinion essay. To get a good grade, students have to follow a certain plan and use certain expressions among which exactly the ones listed as undesirable in your worksheet :D That was the reason for my surprise)))

    Here are two essays given as examples to follow to get the highest grade.What do you think of them considering American rhetoric?:

     

    International tourism is often contrasted with domestic tourism, with the former meaning exciting adventure and the latter, boring leisure. Let’s examine some of the reasons for such differences of attitude and opinion.

    As far as the advantages of international tourism are concerned, these are above all the rich cultural opportunities and an excellent service in hotels. Tourists could visit different museums, galleries, get acquainted with new traditions and customs, taste new food, practice a foreign language and learn something new.

    Domestic tourism also has many advantages such as an opportunity to meet new friends, to admire the most beautiful places of our country, to learn more about our history. What is more, there are also a lot of sights and interesting museums to be seen in our own country.

    As far as the disadvantages of international tourism one can name the need to have international passports, to get visas, currency. Besides not everyone can afford to pay big sums of money for travelling expenses and accommodation.

    There are some disadvantages of domestic tourism as well. Firstly, service at hotels, shops is worse than abroad. Secondly, everything seems boring because there isn’t much change in the world around you. Moreover, a lot of domestic tours cost as much as the international ones.

    To sum it up, both international and domestic tours have its advantages and disadvantages. An English proverb says ”Many men, many minds”. So, one should choose what is better for himself.

     

     

     

    A lot of people, especially of older age, claim that life in their youth was much quieter and they were more sure of tomorrow than young people nowadays. But there are many things I do appreciate today. Among them is a great variety of opportunities we have in life.

     

    Firstly, the life has cardinally changed and at present young people, using Internet and traveling abroad, are more and more informed about the world and other cultures. Secondly, there is a wide choice of activities in which we can take part now, starting from leisure clubs up to political and volunteer programmes. Another thing to mention is a different range of job vacancies offered to young people to earn their own money. This gives us more independence from our family but, on the other hand, it teaches us to be responsible for decisions we make.

     

    However, our society now faces some serious problems such as high crime rate, drug, game and smoking addictions, AIDS, poor environment, etc. They say the society was kinder, the tempo of life was slower.  They were not afraid of unemployment. These are the reasons for the parents’ concern about our future. And though I share their worries, I would rather risk than have uneventful, monotonous, predictable life.  

     

    To sum up, I believe, modern life gives more opportunities and challenges to the youth. There is more freedom, life is more exciting. That is why I hold an opinion that the way of life of today is more satisfying.

     

     

     

    In terms of American rhetoric, the essays are solid. They are organized and the writing is clear. I would encourage the students to use real examples. For example, when one student writes that the service for domestic tourists is bad, I wold ask that student to use a specific instance, in a specific locale, with real names and prices. That is the kind of specif examples that make essays meaningful, at least to instructors trained in at American Universities :-)

     

    Jose


  12. Thank you very much! Your site is interesting and worksheets are useful for teachers of English.

     

    Thank you Lyudmila. It is a work in progress and I hope to improve the quantity and quality of the worksheets, considering that I use them in my own classes! Some of the links help too. For advanced students, the worksheets on nominalizations and strong verbs provide a good challenge.

     

    Thank you for your comment.

     

    Jose


  13. I got surprised by the contents of this worksheet!

    http://www.grammar-worksheets.com/workshee...ice.Opinion.pdf

    I 've always thought it was advisable not to use strong authorial voice in writing while the lesson says quite the contrary. At least it doesnt mention the types of essays where it is appropriate to use SAV (apart from "report about traffic problems"). I got the whole thing as whenever you ARE the author that is in opinion essays you should NOT use such "space-fillers which diminish your credibility as a writer and take away from the message" as "in my opinion, I believe... etc" Have I got it all wrong ?

     

    You are correct, and thank you for reading the worksheet. I hope you can find use for it in the classes you teach. Expressions such as "in my opinion," "I believe that," and "it is my belief that" do not really advance the writer's argument. At least in American rhetoric, these expressions tend to create doubt about the credibility of the author. After all, an essay is, in a sense, an opinion - the author's opinion. There is no need to overemphasize it.

     

    Jose :-)


  14. Greetings from Florida. I am an English teacher in Miami, and I have developed free grammar and usage worksheets. Please feel free to use them:

     

    http://www.grammar-worksheets.com

     

    Thank you for considering visiting my site!

     

    You are correct, and thank you for reading the worksheet. I hope you can find use for it in the classes you teach. Expressions such as "in my opinion," "I believe that," and "it is my belief that" do not really advance the writer's argument. At least in American rhetoric, these expressions tend to create doubt about the credibility of the author. After all, an essay is, in a sense, an opinion -- the author's opinion. There is no need to overemphasize it.

     

    Jose :-)

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